(no subject)
troggie
sublimeade
review for any future BRUCE WILLIS, ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER, SYLVESTER STALLONE movies:

They are terrible and nothing will ever be as good as it once was. I think I've figured out why.

When I was 14 years old in the summer of '95, my dad took me to see a bloodfest called Die Hard 3 Die Hardest. It had Samuel Loud Blackman who I knew nothing about .. in a few years I would frickin love this guy after seeing a few Tarantinos, Do The Right Thing, and even his bit in Coming to America. John McClane solved puzzles and riddles and acted alongside noteworthy talent like Jeremy Irons (Severus' Snape's brother). There were nice people you came to know a bit about for a second, and then their heads were blown off. And not in a nice way like today's shitty directors would have it. No suuuuuupppppeeeerrrr-slllloooowwww-moooooo andthenfastagain. Their bodies didn't lie face down sleeping or just off camera. In the 80s and 90s, if someone died in one of these movies it was going to be shockingly violent and horrific. There would be a loveable douche like Bubby here, who had the terrorists in his back pocket and would use his smooth-talking to get out of a jam and into Mrs. McClane's jam. Or maybe the manager of the Nakatomi bank. And then they got a bullet to their domes. This shit was violent and real and you could not look away from the screen because it was real. It wasn't over-produced fake-as-hell looking CGI effects. You point a gun at ED-209 and you have 20 seconds to comply before you get ventilated. Nothing sanitized for the children (who shouldnt be seeing an R movie anyway). No face ripples and HD blood droplets and terrible music. An airplane full of people crashed and blew up ... hundreds of people died at once. Do you know how terrifying that is for a kid to see in 1989? You'd never want to fly. A sexy ass broad sliced some security guards open at the Federal Reserve Bank. Shit was serious.

And then it got funny, we had a few laughs. The Villians weren't fucking cartoons, they were actors, convincing actors at that, with believable motives. Overall it was an enjoyable action movie experience. The Rock is another prime example of what a great action movie should be, the only good thing Michael Bay ever made. Also, btw, another great Father & Son experience for me and my dad. It should have some of everything, and it should gel.

So I saw Die Hard 5 (barely remember 4 other than it was crap), and this movie is some lame Father & Son hugfest, like if Anakin and Luke were to bust out their lightsabers and go huntin around the galaxy lookin for bad dudes. Some more stupid history revisionist bullshit, this time about Chernobyl ... I wonder how many times they're going to keep revisiting that experience. I bet in 20 years, dumb movies will no longer be "too soon" to make conspiracy theories about the Fukushima disaster. This movie totally sucked. Like Expendables sucked. No tension visible anywhere. No thrills. Just a bunch of old actors who are trying to make the best cash grab of a shitty situation, movies have devolved into special effects and piss poor writing (dialogue, plots, etc.) I didn't see the Conan remake, I wont see the new Arnold sheriff movie or whatever that is, any new Sly movies. Because it all sucks. It's not just nostalgia, folks. I have seen too many movies in my lifetime, I can school you on movies. I am continually giving myself a film education, hit up your local videostore (they still exist) and check out some classics, or go see the ENTIRE Criterion collection on Hulu for free this weekend. It is NOT nostalgia. It's a matter of quality films. I know my shit. This shit really is terrible. Enjoy Iron Man 3 and Avengers 2 and whatever fucking awful sequels and reboots need to be made. There will never again be another everyman action hero.

(no subject)
troggie
sublimeade

Had a dream that I was back home in Highland, maybe 10 years ago. In my parents bedroom, upstairs. There was a puppys head on the ground, thats all no body or limbs, just a head but the head was very much alive. Like just a face. Then it sprouted wings, like a bats wings, and for a few minutes this bat-dog flapped around the room, swooping and zipping past. Then its wings failed and it lay on the ground unable to move again, and although the head looked fine, and the dog seemed happy, the bat wings shriveled up like an old maple leaf thrown into a fire.

Dunno what to make of it

Posted via LiveJournal app for iPhone.

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(no subject)
troggie
sublimeade
Little girl about 8 or 9 wearing a Save Ferris shirt. I'm like ... "you like Save Ferris??" She says yeah. I'm like .. "the last time I saw them was in 2000 or so, I don't think you were here then." She giggles and its the CUTEST EVARRRRR!! Faith in future generations, temporarily restored. Monique would be proud, I'm so raising a kid on checkered Vans and 3rd Wave.

And the world is new!

(no subject)
troggie
sublimeade
plan for the week? get back some of that money I lost for the past 2 weeks .. just work hard, hopefully my back straightens out a bit and I can walk straight again. Spend the weekend with my folks, go fishing/camping midweek. Fucking relax for once.

What actually happened? Went to smelly Mexico, got my face and arms burned off, spent 2 hours in line getting back to the country (DON'T EVER WALK TO MEXICO, it's not faster trust me .. it was like an theme park ride without the ride, all that time could have been spent being shaded in a car), got the gout from all that walking, came home and found my credit card and my car key missing. I dont know how either one got out of my pockets, because my card was wedged between my license and other shit, nothing else fell out except the one card in the middle. My car key? the rubber surrounding the key had fallen off piece by piece, finally it had gone completely and for a few months I'd been using just the metal. I went to get it replaced a month ago (this is Mercedes-Benz parts, not some knock off) but changed my mind as some other shit wrong with my car was more pressing. Wish I had done it then, it's my own fault. Still, how it got out is a mystery. Came home, cancelled my credit card, emailed my mechanic for a new key. Monday, planned on spending just a few minutes with the folks atop Mt Soledad but they wanted to stay for the entire Memorial Day program, so another 3 hours in the sun. Come back home, still can't get in my car parked outside my house so I'm stranded. I asked for Tuesday and Wednesday off so I could go camping and fishing at Santee Lakes, knowing I'd be missing out on money I still need to make up .. but figuring I don't do this often. I thought I'd get my car key same day when they opened up Tuesday. Called all day long and only at the end of the day do i find out that it'll get here Thursday, the very day I was scheduled to go back to work. So I'm not fishing and drinking tonight like I thought I'd be.

(no subject)
troggie
sublimeade
Saw something strange today. A woman, maybe in her 40s, kind of mom-ish, sitting in her car next to mine talking on her cell phone. She had a fresh welt on her left cheek facing me, big old bruise with a cut that's scabbed up. And a puffy black eye to match. Kinda hard to believe she fell and hit the doorknob twice on her face. She was having some serious conversation with maybe her sister or mom or someone who loved her. I felt really fucking bad, but I didn't know what to do. That's me though, always wanting to help but never sure of how to go about it, and always fumbling through whatever action I do take. I guess most people just leave them be, give them their privacy or whatever. But that didn't seem right to me, didn't feel very Christian. I walked into that grocery store pretty fucking pissed off that I couldn't do anything. After shopping I came back to my car and saw she was still there, on the phone, pleading to someone ... she noticed me looking and soon after drove off. I have that effect on them.

It's strange to me because I never really grew up around spousal abuse .. or at least if it happened there were never any signs of it in the neighborhood. I guess I'll never understand what it is that draws women towards men like that. Those guys must have something really special about them. Or maybe it's something to do with women being so complex.

War
troggie
sublimeade
I've been a delivery driver for about a year now. I go to people's homes and meet a lot of folk I wouldn't otherwise have the pleasure of speaking with. And sometimes I see things that shock you a little. Some rather young handicapped men. Men in wheelchairs, some with hooks for arms. You see them sometimes in the grocery store or in line at the bank. A few weeks back I was running out to Reflection Dr. and knocked on the door until the young men answered the door. They took a while; I didn't know why. One in crutches, the other at the back of the room watching tv in his wheelchair. Boys, basically. 20 at most. Should be clubbing, philandering, all that fun stuff. But this kid had titanium for legs, and was bandaged up where the flesh met the prosthetic. I try not to look shocked as best as anyone can ... got wide eyed, polite, smiled, made my run and went about business as usual. Good tipper, too. And the other fella out here in T-town (it's all military housing), a family man. About my age or older, he always calls his dog off when he answers the door. Good chap. It's afterwards that I get to thinking about the fucked up situation. It breaks my fucking heart. I mean it's just as sad as if they lost legs and arms to diabetes or cancer or a car crash. But there are so many of these young people coming back dismembered. Some don't come back at all. And I don't get why. I don't even try to understand why. It's totally their lives and their choice they made, for their country. They must have loved it enough to sacrifice limbs and lives. I wouldn't, for this nation, but they would. I don't try to fathom the mind of a warrior or a soldier. They chose war and they got the brunt end of it. I know that war still carries on when in the parking lot of Reflection, I always see that black Toyota in the Handicapped parking with decals all over the back window .. "Fuck Saddam", "Fuck Osama", USMC.

I guess it's their deal and their lives and I have my own. I'm not one of these people who wears an American flag jumpsuit and worships the ground the military walks on at baseball games. Hell, I stopped putting my hand over my heart during the National Anthem years ago. Military personnel have their job, that they willingly chose, and it adds nothing more or less to the American landscape than any other job. The florist, the revenuer, the doctor and lawyer are all just as important in building up our communities as the soldier is in defending it, as keepers of the peace abroad. As the policeman, keepers of the peace domestically, who people despise .. not knowing a lot of police officers were former military - so you're praising them one year and calling them pigs the next. I really can't stand when the country heralds the military above all other walks of life. That kind of stupidity, I expect from Americans. I just see them as my brothers and sisters, as fathers and mothers. This is the way it's always been, since men were limping back home after turning back the Redcoats, and walking back in Confederate outfits, and beating back the Huns, twice. "The Best Years of Our Lives" (1946) is one of the finest films I've ever seen about this subject .. what happens after war. Maybe one of the best anti-war movies out there.

My point is, I'm still torn. I feel sorry for these people who have to carry on with their lives, missing limbs because of a choice they made in their youth. But I also don't want to pity these people; I want them to feel fully capable, and not different in any way, almost totally ignoring it .. just a regular brother or sister. I don't know what to feel. But it breaks my fucking heart. Lt. Dan was just a character portrayed by fully-functioning actor Gary Sinise. These are real people. The best I can do is follow in the words of Christ ... LOVE

How my Face met my Palms
troggie
sublimeade
I just made a very conscious effort to watch two episodes of How I Met Your Mother, back to back. Pretty painful CBS programming. It's like the heads at all the major networks are collectively trying to kill comedy with their sitcoms and documentary-style comedies and whatever else. I tried to laugh, but I was only able to smile once and groan several times. HIMYM is lame in a very CBS kind of lame (think 2 and a Half Men), just stupid predictable jokes. The actors are okay, it's just too bad the writers feed them terrible lines. With the exception of Jason Segel .. who still has yet to learn the art of comedic timing, or acting. He looks like Herman Munster but can't hit his mark like Herman. He really shouldn't be doing comedy because he wasn't half bad in SLC Punk in '98. They don't even have a live audience, they have an audience watch the finished product and record their reactions. I guess it's better than 2 1/2 Men's laugh track. It's sad because it seems like everyone else is just as terrible; Family Guy (and all of Seth McFarlane's atrocities) really have captured the essence of randomness, and then beat stables of dead horses with their joke killing. Cause it's so much funnier a minute later when you're still doing it. South Park's all about pushing the envelope: sexual, dialogue, etc. Too bad they haven't put together a funny episode about a quaint Colorado town in years. NBC is the awkward network, where all their mockumentaries are based on juxtapositions, and the straight man is the star in a gaggle of loonies. (Office, Parks & Rec, and ABC's Modern Family) Hilarious because it's real (note the shaky camera, zoom in/zoom out) =\

It's like, jokes aren't crafted anymore. They're just recycled and retold in a lamer way. And you can't say, "well everything is old and everything's been done already so there are no new stories, this is the way it's always been." No, that's too easy of an excuse. I think people are capable of writing smart and funny comedies. Every once in every decade a show will come along that has a lot to say if you are quick enough to catch it. Surely to be cancelled quickly, because this goes over most people's heads. I haven't seen one in a while though. The latest great show I could appreciate was maybe Home Movies .. but that's the thing, you have to know shit to get in on the joke. And knowing things has become very unpopular. Frasier was great in its high-brow days, then I guess they ran out of material and in the late 90s went the traditional sitcom route, very low-brow (wacky situations, a little slapstick). That 70s Show was a perfect example .. a bunch of people standing around while a drugged up audience cackles at every little joke, I have to imagine Topher Grace standing there under the lights, posing with the other actors and waiting for the scene to end (there are a ton of shots like this in the show) thinking to himself, "Is that what we're doing? Is this really happening?" I guess that's what I'm getting at. There are too many dumb comedies out there that aren't worth the effort of getting into.

With the exception of the NFL and Jeopardy I can't find anything worth watching on TV these days.

(no subject)
troggie
sublimeade

Worked half a shift last night until my key stopped working. Had to call out of 2nd job today to get my car towed and fixed. Busing in to work Thursday. Called out of my 1st job for the week since I don't know when my car will get back on the road. Slept in the cramped backseat of my car last night, with the windows down. Ate last night, won't eat today. Just wrote a deposit check Saturday on a new place before all this happened. Repairs will be too much. I went from 2 jobs and a place and a car to 1 job and 2 places and car repairs in one weekend. How much is it to rent a gun and buy a bullet? oh wait how I would get to the gun shop ...


 


I napped today and dreamt of that beautiful summer of '06. Felt like a vacation. oh yeah there goes that too .. my first vacation in like 6 years, a trip up to the Bay to see old friends, with all my extra earnings .. gone. Goodbye vacation, goodbye new brakes (front & rear), goodbye new bed (sleepin on a cot, but it's better than a backseat).




God had damn well better give me an A for effort.


back to life
troggie
sublimeade
 working at a pizza place is kind of nice. I've been driving for 2 months now and I like it. Lots of nice people you meet, great people to work with ... mostly high school or college girls. The guys are nice too, all types. I'm still struggling cashwise, but at least there's money coming in. Finally paid off old bills from last year, now all I have to worry about are student loan payments. Life is better.

Lame
troggie
sublimeade
I wish people were more adventurous. This is a problem I seem to have with a lot of friends. Maybe I just attract the kind of people who don't try new things, take risks, go on adventures. I mean from that you could deduce that I am like those people, but in reality I'm always the one suggesting going out, doing something. If I have the money, of course.

Last night Ryan calls me around 7 to go out for drinks. He thought Melyna and Erin (her new roommate) would be joining us. Instead Melyna spends the night packing clothes to move into her new place. We saw it Thursday night, helped her move a few things. I mean literally, a few light boxes .. I dunno why we helped, because I offered my services and a car for moving a ton of shit and she barely had a thing to move. We hung out a bit in the empty place, and it's nice and spacious, but a bit pricey. I hadn't seen Erin since maybe last year. That time we had a drink at The Library, a local dive bar full of old people and young people, and she came with her then-boyfriend and his sister who I thought was cute but I guess other guys wouldn't. Erin's a nice kid; glad Melyna is moving in with a friend instead of a stranger but that's not always so bad. She's a realtor or something, an apartment flipper (I thought people only flipped houses), and she's very assertive which is good for her line of work. Nice kid. I guess Melyna's dog Marley is also moving in there, this little dog that's the size of a chihuahua with ratty hair. I think I have some pictures with him from New Year's 2010. He's a nice dog but like a typical small dog he's all amped up. I wonder what that place will look like when it's fully furnished. So Ryan tells me Friday night about moving some shit and then out for drinks. When I get to Ryan's place after showering, shaving, putting on something clean (totally unlike me, huh?), he's talkin on the phone to his girlfriend and then she's not coming over. She bails a lot, and usually it's just Ryan and I hanging out together.

So we went to the Aero Bar near the airport. I'd been there before, and it was mid-afternoon when I went, but now it was Friday night so it was a different, younger crowd. Nice guys, cute girls, small bar. Watched SDSU beat UNLV in the Mountain West Tourney. Even talked to the owner of the bar. Just before we left I saw this one girl come in, and smiled at her. I don't waste smiles, in fact I rarely ever use them on girls, because they would be grossed out. Little kids and babies and dogs appreciate them. This girl smiled back. And that was that. I never know where to go or what to do from there. That always escapes me. I've seen plenty of movies and tv shows on how to do it, and I've even seen it in action at bars .. hell even that very night. It's just hard getting up the gumption to do it myself, and even if I did it, how does one close on it? Success is ever-fleeting.

I really should just learn that it's not about scoring, that it doesn't have to mean anything. Just to be thankful that a girl smiled at you and for an instant, you had her full attention. Just accept it and let it be. I wish I could accept that and let it go. But when I'm back home early on a Friday night and I'm lying on the couch half-watching bad TV and movies like a zombie, fully dressed, hair still looking right, a light whiff of very good cologne - all that instead of being wrapped up in the arms and legs of a very pretty rosy-cheeked curvy girl .. I can't help but feeling that I'm the one who's lame. Not my friends who go to bars and order "the usual", be it a cocktail or a beer. At MacGregor's it's something standard .. that place kind of blows because they don't have anything special. In fact I think the last few times I've been there I've bought a beer or a pitcher full of something different, like a local micro-brew. He asks what it is, and half the time he orders it the next round. Why not just order it the first time? This is what I do when I order my first beer at a bar, new place or familiar joint - I skim through the list past all the junk I've ordered a million times or shit I can get anywhere and I look for something new. At the Aero there were maybe a half dozen brews I'd never tried. My first beer I had a Scrimshaw Pilsner, great tasting beer and very nice color, not washed out like other lagers. My second beer I had a Palm Belgian Amber Ale. Delicious, and I wanted to try it especially because the only Belgians I've ever had or seen have all been unfiltered ales, which are good sometimes but not something I'd usually order. This was a filtered Amber. Loved it. An old guy is watching the game with me, we talk for a few about the beers and we just happened to be drinking the same kind. Then he reveals he's the owner of the bar. Kinda gives some credence to your taste in beer. Guess who else wants a Palm Amber Ale. Now I'm not against signature drinks ... Melyna has her Long Beach's, and I have my Manhattans although I might also be partial to Rob Roys. So who goes to a bar and orders Newcastle? Everybody, that's who. Be adventurous, try something new, go somewhere new. That's all I'm saying.

This coming from the guy who doesn't have the balls to say hi to the girl who just shot a smile his way. I guess I'm gutsy in just about every way except with women, and maybe jobs. A beer isn't going to reject me ... I will reject a beer if I don't like it. That's the difference I guess. I'm not good enough for people. My balls shrivel up if I leave my fate up to someone else. Ryan's skeptical of new things, Jared has his Coke & Rum, always .. no other cocktails to wash out his palette, not even during King's Cup ... but surprisingly he did a few shots with us on New Years; and Derek won't try any new foods even if we rave about it. Derek is good with tried & true. But when it comes to women, they're rather bold. My legs go weak, I tend to stutter, and my low self-confidence cripples me in just about every way imaginable. Now who's lame?

[Fortune favors the bold]

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